Hira, u are crazier then me and big hug to Genova!

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Hello Hira,

I have to admit your blog looks much professional then mine, I could take some lessons from you about blogging!!!

and luckily I can also understand some words in your blog in Italian, but with the help of the google translator i can understand the main message and I think it is perfect,

maybe I take Italian as next language after Spanish and Portugese to learn!

My readers,

A week ago, when I went to Genova, actually I was 100% sure this story about Nicola will stay on a side for some time, I knew I won’t meet him, but I also think this story will not remain like this forever!

I still cannot believe what all nice people we met with Inés along our hitchhiking trip (I hope u read my previous posts about it)

and I am still amazed, the moment I lost my faith and I wanted to quit the search, a supporter appeared in my life, right before Valentines day.

I was thought not to chase men, it’s theirs job, I do not agree with this and also for the first time I really felt I wanna do everything for this person (well, a bit late).

I think both sides have to make efforts in relationships in equal way, but sometimes we have to let the guys to be the hunters 😉

they are scared from strong women, as usually most of them from me 😀  (yesterday a friend confirmed me this for not the first time in my life…)

But, I also ask the girls, how many guys did you approach in your life? Do you approach guys or it was only me with this problem of I should not approach him, he should make the first step etc..?

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I was sitting tonight with my friend Ines and talking to another friend who has a girlfriend in a distance, she visited him when she wanted to see him, with her friends though, but she did make the step.

We asked him: okay? How about u, are u ready to do the same for her? He got the point very quickly.

At the end of our discussion, he said, he is glad he talked to us. We were glad talking to you too 😉

Ines is the friend of mine, who is very realistic woman and she was talking from experience 🙂

Oh Inés, u also have great relationship stories :))

Anyway, she told our friend before he leaves to visit his girlfriend abroad he should get in contact with her friends to keep her in the city, when he arrives to her place by sudden.  Valid point!

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Why have I wrote these above?

Well, I did not know if  Nicola was last weekend in Genova when we got there and of course, a piece of my heart was hoping I will meet him, when we reached it. Btw even in one of the bars, we got from a barman tips for bars where usually local people go to have afterparty.

We did not check on them, but I kept the paper, once I meet Nicola I will ask him if he is going to these places, as when we talked about his visit in Budapest he asked me about local places he should visit, I told him for me Fogasház is like local place even there are lots of tourist sometimes too, but it is mixed with locals, and common I count for local already, half of my life I lived in Budapest.

I asked if we were in Genova where he would take his visitors, he replied with the same, visiting local places in Genova.

So we got this list with the local places and I will have it here, but we did not use it in Genova. It was the second time we did not listen to an advice of a local person (u remember our story with the hitchhiking from the port?).

I have to admit, sometimes I am such a bad listener, but I also have to say when we finally arrived to Genova we were just to tired to walk around searching for parties,  where this guy “could” show up and for whom we were not even 100% sure lives exactly in Genova. 😀

So the list is here, we might need it in the future, I am so sorry I did not take the name of the guy who provided us with it (yeah, another name I forgot to note down 😀 but I remember the bar where was located, so once I go back I might find him 😀

Please feel free to use this list if you are in Genova after 3 am in the night, it’s local advice. Btw Inés, maybe we should have visited at least this Reggaeton club.

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Anyways, I told u already, we were hosted by Elisabetta and her boyfriend in the city center, we told her about the purpose of our travel, at first I think she could not believe, but you know womens heart, we are romantics.

She immeditaly came up with an idea: Gabi, I have a friend who is a journalist, blogger etc working in local TV she will find him.

I started to laugh, because btw. couple of days before I even wrote a mail to the local tv`s to find him, yes I am ready to do anything for a guy/friend who I think is worth of having him/her in my life.

I had to admit to myself I cannot give it in, he just comes back to my life and wants me to go till the end. I had to give up on all false masks I have, because believe me writing blog about this in public, while I know many of my friends, collegues, acquitances, ex-bosses, new bosses will read it, well you have to have balls for it, not mentioning that this whole thing can end up for me with a failure and rejection, which is the worst as I will have to share the end of the story too. U have no clue how I am afraid how this will end up.

The whole thing about him couple of days ago started to fade for me, because I did all I could and i said to myself life goes on and I decided giving chances to guys I thought they could be the next “Nicola”.

I really wanted to give them a chance, but I kept bumping into the same old story situations with them. I open up all my feelings immediately and they put on their macho masks. No, I cannot do this to myself anymore. I am worth of myself and I do not need to prove this to anyone. Good-bye.

I realized I am again making more efforts and the more I make the less i get emotionally from them.

In that one night I spent with Nicola there were no games from his side, he met me as I am.

You have no clue, how f…. hard is to let go the guys you really like, but I know it will pay off in the end as I am paying attention finally to my feelings and emotions and I somehow I realize quicker who is worth of my attention.

I am in certain way sure, I lost Nicola because of my own mask, my brain did not allow me to speak for my heart. My heart was telling me to ask for his contacts before he left. I did not, because I assumed he can call me, if he wants to meet me, but common I wanted to meet him too? What is this game?

When we met, I had to give him the sign though, but he got me too and yeah I left him a bit to ‘hunt’ me, while I knew I will come to him.

After couple of hours being together I really could not believe he approached me without judgments, for the first time in my life.

And u know what, I did not believe him when he said he likes me, that he likes my full being and he doesn’t give a shit if I am 36, with a kid, if I am divorced, he likes me the way I am. I was so confused, I did not wanted to believe him any word and anyways isn’t it a typical flirting story? I told him many times: you are is lying, and he was confused for not trusting him.

I know every relationship is based on trust and honesty. I did not lie him, why I assumed he was lying to me?

U can imagine how many lies I heard in my life, when there is a person in front of you and wants to meet u just as u are, u are not capable to believe it.

Nicola, I learned from you to meet a new person just as they are in front of me, like for the first time I meet a new friend, it’s just named different, maybe a potential boyfriend.

If I trust my friends when I meet them for the first time, then I can trust to a boyfriend too, in the end he is the person who should be my best friend. Isn’t it?

Anyways, Hira, she is a blogger from Genova, she contacted me this week, she heard my story from Elisabetta and she read my posts about Nicola, she proposed a video call which we could not make due to our busy lives, but she told me on Valentines day she will go into the city and record an interview with people asking them if they know Nicola, she will post it on her blog page and then we will see what will happen.

When she told me about her idea, first I was like: she is crazy and I told her, I think I just have to quit, anyways I think I met a guy who might be interesting,

but, she was more adventorous this time then me and she was very much into the story and we do not have so much romantic stories nowadays, do we???

Hira after realizing I am giving in, she told me I have to do this search till the end, I agreed, why should be different this time I need to finish my things and go till the end.

Nicola played an important role in recognition of myself and if nothing else I want to thank him for this. My gutt is telling me this too, even now.

So, Hira dmade the video and she blogged about it in Italian.

If you speak Italian, well, here is a nice romantic story in Italian about me and Nicola, or just use google translator, like I did 😀

http://teastilografica.blogspot.hu/

In the blog, there is also the video made by Hira while interviewing Genovesen people about Nicola, I have to say while watching the video I was laughing about this whole thing and I could not believe she did this for me and that I am also giving my name for it.

While coming to the end of the video, I had a fear Hira found him and he dumped me. I kept watching and I said to myself, common Gabi, it`s not the first and not the last, u at least did something for him, because u felt he was right for you, we had a misunderstanding that took us to wrong ways, but he is worth of your efforts. I would love, if someone would do the same for me.

I already ashamed myself in front of everyone for doing this another step in this whole story is like peanuts, anyways, why do I care at all what will people say, I am doing this for myself, right?!

Myself in a first row and for him, because I felt i missed a great person in my life and I do not wanna loose nice people from my life, because of some previous bad experiences in my relationships.

Thank you Genovesens, I cannot believe how many people attended this video, I loved it! I am sending all my love to all of you and the most, to all the people who supported me with this whole thing, while you have no clue who I am.

Let`s find Nicola, the Brazilian guy!!!:D

I have to admit among my friends there were only two girls, Inés and Vicky who supported me fully, In;s hitchhiked with me to Genova and she is waiting for each detail of the story each time we talk. Vicky u translated my post into Portugese!

I am gratefull for you both for coming to my life!

And, Elisabetta, Hira, big hug to both of you!

Story TBD and I cannot wait the outcome. Thank you so much for doing this for me even we met once and Hira, we were just Facebook acquitances! 

p.s. today one of my friends Ünige asked me, Gabi how the hell did u get this story in Italian blog??? :)))

Üni, I know u were waiting to read it, so here it is above 😉

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till we find Nicola…..

well, my life goes on and I do not wanna waste any minute of it…

even if I fail in this story, Nicola, I would like to have at least one more friend talk with you at the corner of Fogashaz at the bar!

As u said, u believe there can be a friendship between a woman and man!

Now u see, this is another thing I do not hear often from people! I respect you for this and I agree with you on this fully!

And a BIG THANK YOU FOR SHARING THE VIDEO, THE POST, HIRA`s POST IN ADVANCE!

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2 responses »

  1. Pingback: About me | Gabi

  2. Reblogged this on Gabi and commented:

    Friend, acquitances would you be so kind to share this post for me, I wanna do it till the end and u will hear the story whatever the end is! thank you!

    Like

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